Shyness

I just started working at Oliver, the wine shop next to the Olive Tree. Last night I finished day 3 on the job. Although it's still early, I think I'm going to love this job. It's simple, homey. Nice.

My co-workers are all really nice and I look forward to getting to know them. Become friends with them. I've already found myself endeared by each one of them.

But before that happens, I need to get past my shyness.

When I was a child I was super shy. I would blush, tilt my head down and often hide behind the legs of some adult. As an adolescent I was quiet as well. I stuck to reading books instead of socializing. Or at least I tried. Fortunately I was surrounded by boisterious friends, so I was never able to veer too far off into quiet girl land, but had I not been, I may have spent many of my teen years stuck in the library, instead of sitting at a picnic table, trying to read, while others would snatch the book out of my hands, and bring me back to reality. Back to interacting with others.

Reading through old yearbooks, many people commented on my quiet demeanor.

As an adult, I thought I'd overcome my shyness. I often think of myself as fairly outgoing. I actually enjoy meeting new people and I love being social. But last night, working at Oliver, I felt shy. I can't explain it. It's almost like a vise that grabs me, and though I want to open up, talk, joke, laugh and interact, I find myself locked in. Locked in what? I don't know. But every time I wanted to speak, my voice lost me. My words, though clear in my head, couldn't seem to make their way out. So instead I just smiled, hoping people would see that as my attempt to be friendly, while mute.

I'm sure it will pass with some time, and while it's a bit annoying, there is an odd familiarity there.

Okay, that's all for now. If you're ever down at Olive Tree (which I highly recommend, sooooo yummy) then please stop by next door and say "hi!."