Dear Tawny,

I wore your earrings last night. The ones you made me out of pheasant feathers. I kept my fingers crossed that someone would notice them and compliment me just so I could tell the story... It's one of my memories of you that burns bright. All of my memories of you, while always treasured, are now golden-- they have become more precious because we have no more memories to make-- at least in this lifetime. I hold them all near and dear to my heart- and whenever I have the chance, I share them.

No one ended up noticing them... not because they aren't bad ass earrings (they are) but it just wasn't a notice earrings kind of night. Still, I want to tell the story again; I want to keep reliving moments of life with you.

Do you remember the day I'm thinking about? My dad had caught pheasants a few weeks back that he threw uncleaned into the freezer and Garrett had just shot his first one, so we were tasked with cleaning them all in the front yard. The birds were stiff, cold and dead. It was not a pleasant task.

You hung out the whole time. You didn't want to clean any but you sat with us as Kimi, Garrett and I went to town. I remember you commenting on how pretty the feathers were and collecting some. It was a pretty nasty affair. I cringed the entire time, but I also ended up being the best at plucking, which meant that I ended up cleaning the most pheasants. The next time I saw you, you gave me those earrings, and I loved that you made something so pretty from such an odd event. I also love that you've never been the kind of girl to let the carcasses of the birds deter you from seeing the beauty of the feathers. You always had a knack for being able to pull the beauty out of any moment.

Last night as I got ready to go out and carefully selected your pheasant earrings I could picture you clear as day squatting down and collecting those feathers. Then later laughing your wonderfully sweet Tawny laugh at me and teasing the face I kept making to show you just how miserable I was. I love that I have a memento...a physical object that I can wear on my ears to allow me to relive our past experiences and carry you just a wee bit closer. One that declares just how fricken awesome you were in so many countless ways.

I miss you and love you.

xoxo